I curse you out in my head multiple times a day. I also think of all the things I could say to really hurt you, things that would really get under your skin and even completely break your heart like you broke mine. I also pretend like I’m happy and everything’s okay, I pretend like I understand and know what you mean, but I don’t, I never will. I actually think I hate you, I hate everything that you love and I love everything that you hate. I hate that you pretend that you’re not okay, I hate that you complain about your life to me, even though I know you’re completely happy, I know that everything is right where you want it to be. I hate that I can’t get over you. I hate that I fucking know you and I really wish I could hurt you half as much as you’ve hurt me these years. you’re not a man, you’re not mature, you’re not grown. you have seriously become everything that I hate combined into one person and somehow I fell in love with you and I hate myself just as much as I hate you for that. I also hate that I don’t have the strength to tell you this, you’ll see it eventually.
alright, here we go..
